Forbidden LOVE........

Forbidden Love.......Someone Posed a question on twitter "What if you met the ONE, but were already in a relationship or married?" ....My response was...if they are truly meant for you, God will make it happen! It may not be when you want it to happen, not today or tomorrow, it may even be ten years from now! If it is for YOU it will be for you! We've all heard stories of lost love that was rekindled years later against all odds! If you are married, how would you find out someone other than your spouse is the ONE, without there being some sort of emotional or physical infidelity! I am not a fan of infidelity because as you have read in previous post....it leads to nothing but hurt or someone being hurt! When we open up our hearts to another we are looking for trouble!!!Yes we may feel that this NEW person is the "ONE", because we are confusing lust and infatuation with love.....often times when this occurs we are in the second cycle of our relationship......Let me explain..... Relationships go thru a cycle....first you have the high that you get with new love..... butterflies, infatuation, phone calls everyday, great sex ect!!!! Next, is the turmoil and strife that many couples go thru, when they tend to get to comfortable and take each other for granted.....it is during this stage that many relationships fall victim to infidelity! Instead of trying to spice things up with your mate, many allow their hearts to go astray! Then you have your third stage...Bliss and contentment....if you are lucky to make it to this stage forsaking all the ups and downs, many realize that their mate is actually EVERYTHING they ever really needed! So I pose the question to those who think they have found the ONE outside of any existing relationship....is it the ONE that will truly stand the test of time! Is it worth losing family and everything you and your significant other have worked so hard to achieve? If you answer is NO, than let it go.....if your answer is YES, than its time to sit someone down for a talk!!!!

When Love Turns To Pain!!!!

Five years ago I meet a man, in those five years; we feel in love, started a family, got engaged, broke up, fought and ironically five years to the date of us meeting I walked out of a court house with a PFA in my hand, restricting this man, the same man I was once madly in love with from coming near me for a year! Many days and nights I sit and ask myself "HOW DID WE GET HERE?" To answer this question I must take you to the beginning.......see I was never the type of female to claim a man, I grew up around guys, all my friends were dudes, my cousins were dudes and I have four brothers..... seeing they way they dogged out their girlfriends I was determined to never let that happen to me.....so I beat them to the punch! I only messed with dudes who had girlfriends, and if I fucked your man in my hay day........"I'm Sorry!!!" In my entire life two men have had the privilege of being called my man!! The first man was cool, but lawd this second one has given me a run for my fuckin money......He was charming, handsome and SINGLE......so I thought!!!! That should have been my 1st warning sign ......During the early part of our relationship I equated all the drama I was going thru with this man to KARMA! I had done so much shit in my past, it must be payback time! Then he asked me to marry him, said he would change and of course I gave him another chance, because I was fighting for my family!!!! Then the cheating started all over again...... I then came to the realization that it wasn't me, I was everything a man could dream of......educated, successful, fine and not to mention a freak in the bedroom!......I AM the TOTAL package......so why then was this man cheating on me UNGODLY,with D LIST DUCK BITCHES at that! I came to the harsh truth that pussy don't keep a man, neither does beauty. Men have to be able to provide and protect for their women, if they can't do those things, they start to question their manhood. I debate this with men all the time who say they can handle their woman being more successful than them.....LIES! Ego WILL eventually get in the way causing many to cheat with D LIST BITCHES aka the less successful, less educated, less attractive women! Ladies I'm sure you've caught your man cheating with a bitch and said to your self "WHAT THEE FUCK" or you see a fine man with the "NOT SO ATTRACTIVE" female. These are the women men feel like they can control, some of theses women are content to just HAVE A MAN!!!!! I am not THAT woman, i have too much to offer, after a year or so of public humiliation and sheer fukery I had had enough! Unfortunately he was not willing to LET me go! This man who cheated on me,disrespected me, lied to me! Was being given the ultimate OUT and refused to take it,,,,,,i couldn't wrap my head around it! Why did he not want to leave? Men are very complicated creatures, when they feel like they are losing, they go in defense mode..... SHIT GOT CRAZY.....I could not believe that I had found my self in an abusive relationship.....without going into extreme detail, let's just say things got very ugly! Often times when we think of abuse we think of only physical! However, I have learned abuse comes in many forms, mental and emotional abuse can be much more damaging than physical, which is why I chose o share my story. Often times we sit around laughing with our girlfriends and shares stories "Girl, that nigga crazy!" When he REALLY IS CRAZY! We just choose to ignore the controlling behavior and when we finally decide to take a stand it's too late! Take heed to the little warning signs before its too late!!!! Love can bind us beyond measure, please listen to the voice inside of you, it speaks the loudest even when no one can hear it! Be Blessed!!! I AM!!!!!!